Lost . Mood-less . Speech-less

♥~* My Life~ My World *~♥

I felt I really sucks now..

So hate myself now..

Holding on so many things I am very tired..

Always have to put sense to people head..

Making sure I don't hurt them..

But by doing this,it make me more hate myself..

Cause sometime I just feel I am so fake,can't the truth..

They say they have feeling for me,

but I don't.. and I don't really want to hurt them..

I just so lost..

Everyone have feeling so sometime is different..

Today they say they like me,the next day is so cold to me..

I have said,if you wanna wait you have to wait for a long time,

but by waiting maybe the chance will not come also..

I feel like a bit*h now..
I just so have to go bother every little thing people do to me..
It's hurt very badly.. I try to let go, but, it just stay there..
I really don't want to know everything is happening in you'll..
But it just I know you'll..one is since we are both..one is my best friend..
It's hard when you'll fight about this matter..
I felt sorry.. I will try not to know..

Sometime I am wondering what am I to poeple,to friends?

I really want to know..

am I a friend, a bit*h, a enemy, a useable human??

Can anyone tell me??

I am so lost in all this feeling..
Can I just go numb? Haix..

I guess not I have to deal with this all..
Hope I will not hurt anyone in this process..
In my process of growing..