Yeppie~!!

Ugh~ Me and Xi desperately wanna go holiday~!
Life became so boring only work and sleep.
Really dang no life~!!

I have been longing for holiday since like I dont even remember when.
I really hope I get to go holiday with him,
but I'm not putting high hope as I know how much he love his work,
and he will not just simply take leave.
So gotta ask him is he on.

I just found out,if a guy don't tell them they love you after a month of being together is normal.
If he can fall for u so fast,also mean he can fall out of love very fast.
So now I'm going to use this prospect to see him.

I will wait for him to really mean and tell me he love me.
Hoho~

I'm really happy of one thing for sure,is that he allow me to tell my family about us.
Yesterday when we coming home from our date,he said,
' Got chance then you tell your gradma lor'
Woohoo!!

Now I waiting for maybe there is a family gathering,
then just ask him come out and tell them,
cause I haven officially bring him home yet as a BF.
So I think is a good thing if I do so,rather than just use my mouth to say.

Hope,pray things go well,very well we us!
:P

Lovey dovey of mine after so long!

Things is really nice for now!
After the stop complainting and thinking too much.
But never stop thinking of him,.:P

He will call everyday at least one time. Good enough for me.
He will bring me out if he have the time.Yeah me~!
He will bring me to places I say I want to go! Double Yeah!

Something that I havent really get of my mind is,
went to bring him home,as an official boyfriend.
This part is headache~!

For now really love him,till really wanna bring him home.
But other part of me will say 'slow down,slow down!'
Tsk tsk me~

Anyhow,really happy;
for the past tuesday he bring me go SS2 to have my favorite tong sui~!
Yum yum~ and too
get to met up with Xi and Ray is nice.
Catch up catch up~ hoho.

Few things which I'm excite for ;
Tomorrow date at Sunway.
His birthday with a big surprise.
Kim's birthday party (dont know what to get her yet)
His answer for my family trip (which I not giving any high hope)

Ex Vs Now

What happen when one of your ex said he want to get back with you??
After the break you did ask to get back together but his answer is no,
at that time your heart have already again torn into pieces.
The hurt is still there after all that happen.

For now I'm very happy with my beau,
I really hope he never said that and just let everything be in the dark.
We have been texting each other whole day~
I cant break the news to him that I have a beau.
I worry it hurt him,I know the pain,so I dont wish I do that hurt to him.
But people will also say you have to let him go.
I am not holding him back cause of me,
I never say i love him. I text him as a friend.

But this will get messy as i can say.
I haven't break news to my beau yet.
Cause I roughly will know his reaction,
'Oh,up to you to see who you want to be with.'
Haix,plus telling him also is useless.
He will not have the time to make me feel all lovey dovey.

So for now,this case will be till here which,
I will not tell anyone of them their present in my life.

I do feel sorry for Mr.A.
Cause of the old hurt and scar he given me,
it have make me strong and made me give up on him and move on.
During the time we text each,he always ask me to get someone new.
Now I do and did,he came along and telling me he still love me.

confuss~!

Diet!

I start my diet since I was about 18,by that time was like about 85kg.
Then I loss till about 70kg and gain back 5kg due to bad maintaince. :P
So the journey stop for about a year.
Till this year 2010,I try to loss weight again.
This time I get to go till 73kg.
Then I started working, I drop even more.
Within 3 month I loss around 8 kg.
All my hard work~!!

So now (ngek ngek) about 67 kg d~!
Yeah~!! I will have to try to go even more.
Till I loss my fat tummy!!
Then clothes and mall beware of Jesslyn~!!
=3 really happy!!

Gambateh for myself !!

Gotta keep my head out of love for a bit.
I don't really just wanna have love in my life.
Though sure everything have its ups and downs,
all I can do is pray damn hard that things can be fine.

So lately got to go to FZ (new company) for being bangla worker.
Yea,stopped dad company and go be bangla for a week!
Damn freakin stress week for that,
so many thing to learn, yet so little time. Got sunburn badly! T.T
But for now is better I have been in the office for about 2 weeks.

Loaded with lotsa paperwork which is like coming non stop, is insane in the office.
So far I did alot of mistake but lucky is just small one.
Like mami said: gotta learn from your mistake!

So today,have lunch with a senior, Eugene.
Never know he was so handsome in formal clothes.
Aww~ I really love guys in formal clothes and leather shoes~!

Anyway,life still goes on for me even with things I have anot.
Will do try my best in everythings!
Gambateh~!! :3

Good.

Well don't know why I will have a weird feeling whole day after giving him a stupid call.
It worry me that I'm a burden to him,which I really hope I'm not one.
So after work I try calling him to check so,he seem fine so hope is really okay.
I should trust him right?
ause for 2 years he never find till any girl and now he got me,
I should trust that there is no others out there for now.

I have already plan for wednesday to have a small talk with him,
then only we go for movie.

Lost.Confuse.

How should this road end up with? Will it end up with the one I hope for or the one which I don't even wanna think about it? I really trust you like no others. I don't wanna force you to do things which you don't feel like doing. In short is I don't want to make too much changes in your life but just maybe add me in your life.

I know from the start you have already told me about that you will not have time for me,cause work is important to you now. Yes,I understand,it is cause your time for working is important. But I still hope that you can know what I want. But I till now still don't have the guts to tell you anything about it,only comprehension with you. I'm really sad when ever I hope you can just maybe spend a little bit more time with me it will end up spending lesser than that.

As you told me you're a person of actions not words,but as for a girl sometime words just means something. There is not a need of saying it everyday,but once in a while will be nice. As I went for advise, my sister all told me,we are just entering the relationship so is abit too fast if he say he love me. Even is not saying that,once in a while when you really miss me can just text. But it never happen.

I really don't put too much feeling in it and also not hoping much. All I can do is just maybe follow your foot step,but I worry it is just going no way.

I'm so lost,I no longer know where we stand or is from the beginning I already don't know where we stand.

I hope I can tell you all this. But I worry this burden you which I don't hope so,with all the problem you have already in hand.

End up I chose to write it here where you will never get to see it or know it.

Dont get you?!?!

I dont get you by how you want this go~
I dont think I actually get you yet.
Maybe we are going too fast.
I'm really lost now,what are we??
Does normal couple meet once a week,and for 2 hour only?
Some abnormal relationship ya,but is ours abnormal?
I dont get it and you..

Fuck you.Die~!

Okay lately mood really not that good~!!
Is like wave going ups and downs which I'm totally hating it now~!!

For the last few days I got so damn mad with A-biatch who crapping using her big mouth and not using her brain!!
Really fuck her for want to find topic to talk to my best friend. She really piss me off alot. For all my life she is the only girl that have ever make me this mad and hate her~!! Gosh~!!
Where is the stop button for her???

Crapping about people is girl thing I know but not infornt of people best friend and not those crap,that is so off the line call a friend cheap~! As I recall even though I dislike you alot I never use that word for you. Cause that word is a very bad word to use for any girls~!! So fuck you for using it on me,and which I wanna return it to you~! Thank you very much~!!

You are such a good actor! Who can act all buddy buddy with me after what you say. Thinking only you yourself can find love and people like me cant get and have to crap about me. This is the max limit of me~! I'm kinda glad that I dont really put you in my life~! Cause you will be the ruiner for everything! Go crap everything you want in your blog,thinking you are all goodie goodie,like you're flawless. Fuck you okay,dont have to act inccoent at all cause you're not one,and go have a fucking make over! Cause you need one~!!

Okay~ I feel sooooo much better after that!! hmpt..
After i telling my mum saying she say i cheap,guess what she said..
No need to guess la,I tell you.
She say if you're not one people will not say that~! WTF
Even my mum think I'm like this,really fine~!! I'm a cheap girl~!

Really dont understand,sometime I just wish to die~!!
Let me die,I have enough all this crap in my life~! Seriously,who ever wanna kill me pls come now~~

But before I die I wanna tell some poeple some things.
Xi you're my best friend ever~! So please dont go betray me~!
Andy,I really really love you~!
after that I so can die~!